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so you should understand that the agreement is not that important. You have primary legal and physical, so ex has very little recourse Find couples anyway, and has to take whatever you offer. My suggestion is this. Write an agreement you can be sure you never break. Then offer too much. Give til it hurts. He lives in another state, and it is important to maintain the relationship with the. Yes, that means you do the work and he gets the fun to some degree. Let him have extra time every. Offer break, Christmas, etc. Most people have multiple Xmas's anyway. It doesn't have to be on 'the day' The same is true of birthdays. Give til it hurts. Offer to pay for the airline tickets occasionally. If you e custody arrangement and your state you should get a good feel for what is normal. In the same town it is usually Wed and every other weekend, rotating holidays. Out of state I have seen one weekend per month plus weeks in, break xmas etc.
You two discuss and make decisions for your relationship, your time, and your. Leave the other woman out of it until you have discussed and come to some agreement on how you and bf approach this friendship. You seem like a little bit of a control freak. Do you treat bf as an equal partner regarding your? Does he take that responsibility seriously? I think that most of these problems can be resolved by communicating with your bf in a mature and respectful manner. You both seem a bit immature and it take a little bit of growing up on both of your parts. You two have a now and you need to get your relationship in order.